When I am King #5 – Super Bowl Edition

These are hard times in the Images and More clubhouse. I bought a new computer and the transfer of all that was on the old machine has been anything but easy and often traumatic. Stuff that should be available to me is not. Connectivity with the outside world is currently non-existent. Software programs that will have to be found and re-loaded present a daunting task for this old fossil computer-phobe. The gremlins that have haunted me have massed for a full assault on my sanity. Professional help is on the way but they must be forewarned about the powerful ju-ju they will face. To wit…when I brought my old and new machine to Best Buy for the customary data transfer, the store’s own computing system went down and stayed down until just before I left the building.

As you may have noticed, the new year has gotten off to a slow start, blogging-wise. This lousy computing situation has much to do with that. I have images to show and stories to tell but cyber gremlins and winter doldrums have sapped my enthusiasm. We’ll recover soon but with the Big Game coming and the need to keep this space warm, I am obliged to offer up a couple of football-related changes that will happen when I assume the throne. After all, Super Bowl XLIX is coming. The New England Deflators will battle the Seattle Coffee Fiends and I will be glued to the tube…as I have been for every one of the previous XLVIII games.

Football Player by Ted Ringger, Sr. (1943)

Before WW II, my father was an art student. 

He also played semi-pro football. 

This clay piece he made in high school

is one of the few works that survive him.

I know I’m whizzing in the wind when it comes to our National Pastime. We Americans just love our gladiator sports. I must confess I also enjoy the game. I think more about the athleticism and teamwork required to play the game well…and less about the toll it takes on many of the players. I’m glad more people are paying attention to the long-term damage caused by the repeated physical abuses that the game requires.

Football is not a contact sport. Basketball is a contact sport. Two guys running full speed into each other from opposite directions make this a collision sport and our bodies are not equipped to deal with that. However, it’s easy to see how the lure of the game can overrule one’s better judgment. Players still crave the money and glory and are willing to either ignore or accept that their later years might be awful or even non-existent.

I know I won’t be King for long if I turn the game into flag football. How about this for starters? Don’t hit the head. Ever. When tackling, don’t lead with your head. I know…that’s already against the rules. How about this? Don’t butt heads with your team mates. I don’t understand why these guys think that’s a proper celebration move. Don’t slap each other in the head either. This is another celebratory antic and is also apparently conducted as a tough-guy warm-up exercise to get ready for the game. Unless you want to be known as the National Concussion League, stop banging your heads.

Finally, when I’m in charge, broadcasters will pronounce the name of the Jacksonville franchise correctly. If I have to electrically charge their chairs and shoot a few volts up their asses or activate a trap door that drops them out of sight the next time someone calls them the “Jag-WIRES,” I will. 

I hope your team wins, the commercials are fun, the snacks are tasty and there are limited ‘wardrobe malfunctions’ during the halftime show.